Is It Really That Hard?

© Ann Marie-2012

Integrity: a) the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.  b) the state of being whole and undivided.

Integrity is something that you have or don't have.  Something you choose.  A way of living your life that helps define who you are.  It is a part of a person's character that is very important to me.  Especially the honesty part.  I'm a very honest person.  Sometimes to a fault.  I do keep some things private, but when presented with an opportunity to tell the truth or to lie, I choose to tell the truth.  I'm certainly not without flaws, but when it comes to my life, my friends and in business, I am an honest person.

So it is, that when someone I know and love demonstrates a lack of integrity where I am concerned, it blows my mind. It stops me dead in my tracks, as though I suddenly walked right into a brick wall.  It hurts.  It stuns.  It leaves me feeling angry with myself for being so stupid.  People stumble and fall down in life, and we have all made mistakes where other people's feelings are concerned. But when we make a conscience decision to demonstrate a lack of integrity, we do so from a very selfish place in our hearts.  We let our ego dictate our actions.  We choose to lie and cheat and do the wrong thing because it gives us pleasure, and often protects us from having to deal with the hard stuff in life.  It also allows us the excuses we need to justify our actions - "I lied to you because I didn't want to hurt you."  I call bull crap on that one.  

A person lies to protect themselves.  They are not honest because they fear the truth.  Because they can't deal with their own stumbles.  Because they don't want to be vulnerable.  They refuse to risk the judgement that may come from being honest about their actions.  But in their dishonesty and in choosing to do the wrong thing over the right, they are damaging their relationships, tearing down trust and blocking love.

I've had more than one person in my life tell me I'm too honest.  Funny that statement always comes from those revealed to have less than stellar integrity.  I would never say that I have always demonstrated the highest level of integrity in my life.  It is a trait that we learn to have as we grow and mature.  Perhaps even becoming a habit that we no longer have to ponder when faced with making decisions. I also believe that it all comes down to our motives.  If our motives are pure and true, then our actions will be made with integrity.   

It just feels right for me to an open and honest person.  That when faced with doing the wrong thing which would result in personal gain, I choose to do the right thing trusting that the Universe will provide for me in the long run.  Life is hard, and sometimes if we cheat a little or lie just a bit, it seems to make life easier.  But I promise, in the end it will not be so.  

Choose integrity.